Lady…Just Shut Up Already

The Wild Boar and I went to dinner the other night to a great restaurant.  We’ve been there several times.  It’s a fun place, it’s festive, it’s not a quiet joint but not loud either.

However, the tables are VERY CLOSE together.  Like inches close.

As the Wild Boar excused himself for a short trip to the bathroom I began to focus on the voice of woman sitting at the next table.  I was not eavesdropping on purpose, SHE WAS HAVING AN ABSOLUTE FIT and not in a quiet way.

She could not contain her opinion about a table of four diners next to her.  She had been observing a woman at the other table who told her dining mates she would not be partaking in the bread/appetizer part of the meal. Again, this is how close we were, you could hear all this stuff.  The difference was this table of four were enjoying their night and weren’t paying attention to Miss Ranty-Pants sitting next to them and me.

The woman said to her husband, “That woman’s friends should be protesting her half-hearted presence”.

Ummm…Kay.  A  bit harsh don’t you think?  And this woman was not nicely whispering this.  Her voice was loud and she was talking with such disgust and anger you would have thought the woman at the other table had just committed a felony.

She went on: “Oh, look at her, sipping only water while her friends enjoy wine.  Terrible.  What bad manners.”  Or something like that.

What?  At this point the Wild Boar returned but now I was so involved in this whole debacle and WAS NOW totally eavesdropping on purpose because I had never heard anyone so PISSED OFF about something that was so entirely none of her business and wasn’t even important.

“I’ll bet that woman orders a salad for dinner.  I know she will.”  While she pounds her fist on the table.

Gawd! I mean seriously, what the hell?  Why did it matter?  But all I could hear was her voice.  No matter what I did I couldn’t stop hearing her rant.

“I can’t wait to see what she’ll get.  I bet it’s a plain, damn, green salad, I know it.”

The poor man this woman was with looked exasperated, skittish and deer in headlight-ish.  He didn’t say a word, which is probably how she has gotten away with talking crap like this her whole life.  But geez, this woman NEEDED AN INTERVENTION.

“Oh my gawd!  I knew it, grilled chicken!  Do you see that?”

Okay, when was the last time grilled chicken was so evil!  It can even be fattening if you eat the skin!  Last time I checked, grilled chicken was still good to eat, diet or no diet.

“Do you see her, I bet she doesn’t even finish it.  If you are out with friends you should eat like you’ve never eaten before.  What’s wrong with her?”

I couldn’t take it anymore.  She wasn’t going to stop.

My back was to her.  I did something so unlike me but I felt provoked even though she had no idea I was even listening.

I spun my chair around, which made a horrible noise and I said, “Enough!”  Her jaw dropped.  I seriously thought she would clobber me with her purse.  Eeks, maybe I overstepped my boundaries…

I spun my chair back around.  Now the Wild Boar was looking a bit deer in headlight-ish.  Even I was surprised with myself.

But you know what?  She shut up.  Not even another peep came from her trap.

They left.  And we ate.  In peace.

So could anyone please tell me what was wrong with this woman?  Was she bored?

Now, I would like to say I have been to dinner with someone who didn’t eat ONE thing because she was dieting and it was very uncomfortable.  Kind of like, why are we here?  But this woman wasn’t NOT eating, she just wasn’t gorging.

Have I missed some type of social etiquette rule where in the company of others you must stuff yourself to kingdom come?  Is this a rule?

Is it not totally bad manners to watch what others eat and the speed at which they eat it at?  Isn’t it?

This was just weird.  I feel better now that I’ve told you all about it.  Thank you.

Post a Comment


  1. Chinya 1

    You did what I wish I would have the nerve to do! Instead I am always concerned about hurting someone’s feelings. At least you were “nice” about it, it could have been a lot worse :)

    I am not a dieter, instead I have one “splurge” day a week and eat pretty good the other six. So if I go out to dinner with friends I might have one glass of wine with the grilled chicken instead of 2-3 glasses and the fried chicken!

    But that doesn’t really matter because either way, that lady really did need to shut her trap!

  2. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I think you’re a loony magnet ;)

    There’s no other explanation!

  3. Deeba 3

    I think what you did was priceless! I would have probably ranted about her ranting, in hushed tones…& never would have gotten to eating our meal in peace! BRAVO!!

  4. HoneyB 4

    LOL GOOD for you! That woman needed to be told to shut up. Who cares what anyone eats or does as long as it is not doing harm to the rest of the world?! I probably would have done the same thing you did.

  5. No. Way. WTH was her problem?! I would have totally loved to see her face when you told her that enough was enough. lmfao

  6. Well don you for shutting up that woman! I don’t now what’s up with people, I guess they just live a sad life and want to drow attention to other people before someone notices them. That’s just my guess…

  7. Kim 7

    Cathy- as I read this I came to a couple of conclusions. First, I totally agree with Christie’s comment. You do have a knack for attracting this sort of character. Second, what great writing material you are being fed. Third, good for you for stepping out of character and saying “enough”.
    People who act this way always do so “out of fear”. Why? Who knows? Maybe the lady will think before she speaks out against someone again.

  8. Marcy 8

    /Pats Cathy on back for having a bit of a backbone!
    Way to go… now me in the same situation probably wouln’t have been so nice. I would have asked her to be quiet, then if she smart mouthed me that would have been it.
    You know people pick on others to draw attention AWAY from themselves. Did you happen to look at what bigmouth had on her plate? was she several pounds overweight? not that that would matter, but picking on how little someone else ate? puhlease….
    And drinking water instead of wine? I would have had to do that too, I’m not allowed to drink alcohol anymore, and no i’m not a recovering alchey, its for health reasons…
    and I would have told her in a sweet voice why I wasn’t drinking and that it was none of her damn business!

  9. melly~ 9

    I hate that we have to share our planet with the miserable.
    my only problem is she didn’t have wine. something is very wrong with someone who doesn’t take every opportunity to partake. ;)
    Good for you, speaking up. Sometimes the bitchy need to be silenced.

  10. I would throw Miss Ranty Pants out of the restaurant if I manage that place. I threw a customer out before when their behavior disturbing other guests. Wonder why servers there didn’t spot her behavior. We all eat out for one simple purpose “enjoy our night out and forget to be our own slave for one day”. I would do the same as you did. Standing up for what right. Why letting someone ruin your night out? I would not mind when people ask me across table “hey what do you have, it looks great!” or engage some conversation with us. I bet she learned a big lesson you taught her. On the back of her mind, she will remember that next time she open her mouth in the restaurant, there will be another Cathy tell her to shut…

  11. I also hate that as much as overhearing a group of servers gathering in the corner trash talking about customers. I walked up to them, checked out, and went to another restaurant. And told manager on the way out. I would not feel comfortable even to politely ask those people anything or enjoy my dinner there. They would treat me the same as they did to other customers. If they don’t love their job, I don’t need to eat there.

  12. misty 12

    good for you!
    I think that some people (more often, women) just stick themselves in other people’s business because they are so miserable in their own lives.
    What a cow.
    If they are her true friends, they totally get what she is doing and who she is and love her anyway. That’s why she’d be there! Grilled Chicken or giant plate of pasta.

  13. ROFLMAO!!! I LOVE that you “Enough ed!” her! lol She would have a fit watching my hubby and me. We frequently SHARE a meal when we go out at certain restaurants where we know the meals are HUGE. And water.. I always order water.

  14. Krissa 14

    What the heck was her problem?? If we’re in a situation like that, I am usually not brave enough to say anything, but my husband is. We were in a restaurant with our kids and the people at the table next to us were dropping the f-bomb in every sentence. It was so inappropriate. Even my kids could hear it. SO, my husband calmly got up, walked over to their table and told them, not politely, to clean up their language. I’m sure everyone else appreciated it, too. Rude restaurant behavior is a pet peeve of mine.

  15. Elle 15

    The only one with bad manners (and a screw loose) was the woman on a rant. I’m very surprised the woman/group she was speaking about didn’t say anything, but I’m thrilled that you did!

  16. Stands up and applaudes
    Good for you!

  17. Meg 17

    Priceless~I would have loved to have been there to watch that, good for you! I would have done the same thing and been totally amazed that I actually did it! My husband would have been mortified, lol!

    I have been in similar situations and threatened to do what you did and had El Jefe shut me down. Guess he was afraid the woman I was going to direct it at was bigger than me, lol!

    GOOD for you!!!!

  18. Meg 18

    Well, I just commented…wonder where it went?
    Anywhoo…good for you!
    I would have done the same thing, much to El Jefe’s dismay and been totally shocked that I did…usually I talk myself out of it…but sometime. I was actually in a similar position a while back and wanted to speak my mind to the woman at the next table, but El Jefe shut me down, lol!

    GOOD for you!

  19. This woman OBVIOUSLY has seriuos issues…did she have a weight issue perhaps? Sometimes people see others as a threat – or sometimes people see opportunities like this to be a big ol’ bully.
    Good for you – HOORAY – I would’ve done the same.

  20. So Gladys Kravitz is alive and well…?:)

  21. Katie 21

    All I have to say is Bravo! I hate when people do that but I do get grossly involved into listening to them complain then and it drives my husband nuts.

  22. Suzette 22

    I’m so proud of you! I would have WANTED to say something to the woman, but probably wouldn’t have. This reminds me of my recent trip to NYC. We were jammed elbow-to-elbow in a very nice restaurant. A thirty-something couple was seated next to me. It became apparent right away that this was a luncheon to determine whether their relationship would continue. I learned WAY more about their personal lives than I could have possibly cared about. Then, at one point, she said….”Well, I guess we’re over then.” He said, very simply, “Yes.” And she then said, “How’s your fish?” So bizarre.

    Thank goodness my credit card was returned to me about that time.

  23. sharon 23

    Ha. Hubby and I always joke that somehow we’re always seated next to a) crazies or b) awkward conversations at restaurants.

    I agree that it’s annoying to go out to dinner with someone who won’t eat, but only when its at your own table! The lady was probably a tad insecure about her own large meal.

  24. Sue 24

    Good for you!!!!

  25. Barbie with a T 25

    You chose the right word and did the right thing! That woman should not be allowed to ruin your good meal by being so outspoken. That is too nice of a description….she was a real loudmouth and needed to be shut up!

  26. Steph 26

    It sounds like she needed to be put in her place! I am glad you did what you did!

  27. The only rude person there, was that lady who was ranting. I would like to say I would do the same as you did, but I totally would have wimped out.

  28. Bravo, Cathy! If I had been in your shoes, I’m not sure I would have had the cajones to tell her to shut her pie hole. So, kudos to you.
    I don’t think there is any social rule (that I know of) that says that you must stuff yourself silly when dining with friends, although I do like to do that anyway. And even if there was such a rule, what a complete and total strager did with her own time, mouth and money was none of that woman’s business. I bet her male companion wanted to jump up and french kiss you!!!

  29. Daisy 29

    I wish I had been the woman ordering water! I would have LOVED to have said something (but I would have totally had the green salad as I used to be a vegetarian and haven’t started eating much farmed meat yet.)

    Seriously, I work from home and some days that means having oreos all day long. If I have a date with the girls, I’m not going to stay home because I don’t feel like having the bottle of wine I usually consume all by myself. I’ll go eat lightly, and enjoy one of the main reasons I go out to eat in the first place: the change of place and the company.

  30. Anna 30

    Oh, that was awesome! Good for you for calling that woman on the carpet. She obviously has some serious issues to be that upset with what someone she doesn’t even know is eating at a restaurant.

  31. Im glad you said something to her! What a freak! I don’t know why she was obsessed w/ making that poor woman eat. Very weird–but it makes for good blogging!

  32. leslie 32

    YOU GO GIRL!!! I would have done the exact same thing! And I would have been all shaky and my blood pressure probably would have been elevated…but again it shut her up!!!! Funny!

  33. Bravo Honey! You did the right thing. I’m surprised the restaurant didn’t give you a round of applause.

  34. Teri 34

    Bet she’ll think twice the next time she opens her big mouth! I’m sure everyone around wanted to applaud! Her husband should have done that years ago! Doesn’t that woman realize that some people may actually have restricted diets due to certain disorders… I actually am one and I still love to dine out with my friends. Though difficult, it would be much harder to have a woman like that sit next to me! See, this is why I am addicted to your blog… so funny! NOW, can you imagine the ride home in that car??? Poor hubby! He’s probably dreaming of bumping into you somewhere to personally thank you!

  35. Misty 35

    Good for you Cathy. If there is some sort of rule like this, I have missed it! I bet it felt good to say that!

  36. Erin 36

    Wow! Go you! I would have totally never been that brave. I think the woman probably has food issues. Was she fat? Some people can’t stand to see other people make good food choices because they know they should be doing the same thing. And they take it personally when other people eat better than they do. But getting that ticked off– by someone you don’t even know– that’s a little extreme. Yeesh.

  37. Cheryl 37

    Inordinately proud of you for intervening. I have no problem offering “correction” to children who behave in a socially inappropriate way (nor do I have a problem, but ENCOURAGE others to do the same if they seem my children doing so…takes a village) what a shame that no one took the time to educate this grown-up on appropriate behavior. way to handle it. I salute you.

  38. Trisha 38

    Good for you!

    Seriously though, I don’t think there is anything wrong with eating in moderation and not drinking when you are out with friends as long as you don’t make a big issue out of it. Maybe the woman was an alcoholic and was drinking only water for that reason. Maybe she had had the lap-band surgery and was physically unable to eat much. The woman who was commenting was so rude to talk about another person without knowing the particulars!

  39. Rayrena 39

    I think you handles the situation very well. It was none of her business what the other diners were eating and she sounds like the kind of person who always needs to bitch about SOMETHING.

    On the one hand, I feel bad for her husband. On the other, I agree that his being scared/lazy/whatever has in part allowed her to become such a witch. We bother being in a relationship if you’re not going to help that person live up to their best potential? You probably helped him have the best meal in his life; one in peace! But his ride home and time before bed were miserable as she went on and on about what a nasty woman you were :)

    While we all have our opinions and moments of crabbiness, we should at least have the manners to bitch quietly!

    I’m cracking up at the thought of the Wild Boar looking like a deer in headlights!

  40. Way to go Cathy! I would probably been a little harsher than you. As I see it, if they have the nerve to run their mouth about something that’s none of their business, I have the nerve to shut them up! My worst pet peeve is when people yell and belittle their children in public. My husband hides when I start making my way in their direction. I’m normally not too outspoken either, but when enough is enough…it ain’t pretty!

  41. That was the craziest story I’ve ever heard!

    That woman had no clue as to what was going on with that other woman. Maybe she didn’t have wine because she doesn’t like it or she a recovering alchohoic! Maybe she is on a special diet because she was losing weight or something! What a dumb bimbo. I would have yelled at her as well. I probably would pulled out my handy “Shut your pie hole” comment just so I could see the look on her face. :)

  42. Leah Q 42

    I luv it! – Ranty-Pants! Only someone as smart as you could have come up with that…yes its hard when people are so entirely nuts, but I feel you did the right thing… the other table I am sure could also her this women’s ridiculous rants which were obviously not her own biz…!

    Reminds me when people speak on their cells phones about nothing, and do not care their are invading ‘your world’ by their yelling and saying things that are not world-altering such as, yeah, im getting on the bus now, no, Im sitting down…lol

    ranty-pants – that’s one for the books!


  43. Karly 43

    I’m curious, was the ranty woman overweight?

    And I really wish you had a picture of the Wild Boar looking like a deer in headlights. I’ll bet that was hilarious!

  44. somewhere out there, a woman is writing a blog entry today about a lovely dinner that was ruined by a ‘ranting’ woman who shouted “enough!” at her while she was ‘innocently talking to her husband’ during her meal last night. lol. :D

  45. I hate the live and expect people to live like me-ers
    She must be one damn miserable person to do play by plays on others while she should be enjoying her dinner with her husband or whoever she was with. You have some major pig balls!! ha ha That set her straight eh?

  46. It takes all kinds…

  47. Okay, that is THE strangest thing I have EVER heard of! What’s it to her if someone wants to order grilled chicken and doesn’t want bread!? I mean – it’s NONE of her business!! Wow. She must not have taken into consideration that it may have been a health issue she was dealing with or something. And even if she WAS dieting, big deal – that is HER choice and it should be no concern of the stranger in the restaurant. Gee whiz, I don’t blame you a bit for snapping. I would have too. That is unreal!!

  48. Good for you! I wish I had the guts to do something like that! That woman shouldn’t have been so critical. It’s true it’s fun to go out and indulge with your buddies, but the woman may have had health issues or food allergies. I’ll often go out with co workers and not eat if I don’t like the restaurant or I’ve got a ton of food in my fridge. I’m too cheap to pay $15 for lunch when I could eat leftovers for free!

  49. Candy 49

    Wow. Just wow!

    I can only assume she would have felt better about what she was eating if everyone around her was doing the same. I know people like that. If everyone is having the chicken, they’ll order the chicken, when what they really want is a greasy hamburger. Sometimes the choices of others make a person like her feel less than. But that’s her insecurity and no one else’s.

    There’s no accounting for people is there!

  50. You and I would so get along!! I have…um…been known for the occasional public outburst when the situation has warranted it. This was definitely one such occasion, so BRAVO!! :-)

  51. Becky 51

    I bet her husband / fellow diner was so totally happy that someone finally said something!
    :) Becky

  52. Living in a popular tourist destination, I witness this sort of thing all the time. I don’t know why people think that being on vacation justifies acting like a jerk in a restaurant. Good for you for taking a stand.

    Before I read this, I was also formulating a post about bad restaurant behavior-by the wait staff. There is certainly a lot of material on that subject! ;)

  53. Pam 53

    I bet the woman was feeling insecure with her own self image. She was feeling guilty for ordering a very fattening meal and was trying to make herself feel better by making the other lady the “bad guy”. All I can say, is life is too short to put up with nasty and negative people – good for you for saying something. Maybe she will be a little less judgemental in the future.

  54. Fran 54

    I wish I could do that! I tend to wuss out at confrontation. Good for you!


  55. ALF 55

    Good for you for saying something! What is wrong with people? My mom always told us as kids to keep our eyes in our own plate and never comment about what others are eating.

    I have a VERY bad habit of eavesdropping on conversations while we’re at restaurants. You wouldn’t believe the number of people who are having fights while out to eat. It’s quite entertaining but my husband HATES when I do it.

  56. Helen 56

    I would be interested to know if this woman was overwieght herself? Because se made such a song and dance about how awful it was for someone whom, she had obviosuly noticed was watching what they ate. She sound like she is bitter to me, and insecure. Perhaps she was feeling insecure becasue the woman was achieveing something she would like to and she was jealous? WHo knows!

  57. My husband wonders if I moonlight for the CIA the way I can “hear” all the conversations going on around me (while he just blissfully dines unaware). I’ve heard lots and lots of “stuff” but this takes the cake. I would have probably turned and shot “a look” at the boisterous one, but doubt I could have mustered the courage you did (besides my husband would have died on the spot). Why would this woman behave so unseemly? I blame the voyeurism nurtured by tv, oh and a healthy dollop of shockingly rude behavior.

    p.s. Hope I never eat there … I seldom enjoy wine with my dining experience (sulfite allergy) and ALWAYS take away a portion for later (so I can nibble some of my husband’s dessert) — that woman would have a field day with me. ; )

    Any sulfite-free recommendations?

  58. Bridgett 58

    If you could hear her easily, I bet grilled-chicken woman could easily hear her as well. It is just petty on her part, but then maybe she is bored to death with a husband who says nothing and just sits there.

    I’m happy to hear you said something. Her being a mouthy, ignorant woman in public shouldn’t have to be tolerated.

  59. Laura 59

    I am soooo proud of YOU! No one knows what the situation is that she is not drinking but if I were there I woudl not be drinking wine either (nothign against wine but I am an alcoholic and hence no alcohol for me) maybe the person had eatten a late lunch and simply was not hungry and wanted to spend TIME with friends… who knows… but you handled it excellently cause I would have said something much less nice and would have given a reason for the woman to clobber me with her purse… ACH….

  60. Go Cathy!! That’s awesome. The only thing I was thinking was that the poor woman (the target of that woman’s tirade) could be pregnant. I remember having such bad “morning” sickness but still wanting to go out with our friends. I drank water when everyone else drank wine. I picked at my food. But, I tried to be light-hearted about it.

    Either way, good for you!!

  61. CarolG 61

    I loved your story. I at times enjoy listening in on conversations other tables are having (if they are loud enough to be considered public) and it can be interesting to look at other people’s food choices but there are limits. As others have already pointed out it was none of Ms. Ranty Pants’s business what others chose to order. On the list of reasons for ordering a bit differently, my spouse has diabetes so he will structure his meal to get the most enjoyment from his allowed carbohydrate servings. Thank you for confronting a truly obnoxious person. I wish I had been there to see it.

  62. magpie 62

    That is peculiar. But I’m glad you called her out on it.

  63. Egghead 63

    Yay for you! She needed a wake up call.

  64. Nell 64

    Good for you Cathy! I think my husband would have died if I had done that. I have been in similar situations and can’t believe how inconsiderate people can be! I would love to do what you did, but I kinda love my husband!

  65. phillygirl64 65

    Hooray for you, Cathy!

    So what if she wasn’t drinking wine or having an appy…she was with friends and that matters more than what she ordered…

    Maybe you should have given her some crow to enjoy with her meal…I’m sure there was something mockable about her plate

  66. Candice 66

    Hell yessss I LOVE that you did this!!!

  67. Kenya 67

    More and more, society has just embraced a “rude” lifestyle. It’s not just that woman making crass remarks…but it’s the people who see you coming towards the door but won’t bother to hold it open for you, or the people who want to have in-depth conversations on their cell phones during a movie that you paid $9.00 or more for. Adults have the choice to eat whatever the hell they want, which is why the nice people at the restaurants have those lovely things called menus; and the last time I checked it wasn’t against the law to eat light. Maybe she was dieting, maybe she wasn’t all that hungry…maybe just maybe she had medical issues that required her to eat certain foods. No matter the reason, the woman had no right to be so cruel because well…it just wasn’t any of her ugly business. If anyone displayed bad manners, it was obviously the woman making the comments. Someone mentioned that they would have thrown her out of the restaurant; I totally agree. Why should others be subjected to her impolite behavior while they are trying to enjoy their meal? Good for you Cathy, and good for your You took all you could, said one word and she shut her over-used, embittered trap.

  68. Wow…
    So, if you could hear her, couldn’t the woman that was eating so carefully hear her? I wonder why she didn’t comment?

    How funny that the woman behind you took such an interest in the meals of others. It would have been entertaining to turn and ask her expert opinion on what was good on the menu! Likely that would have silenced her as well since she obviously didn’t care for the spotlight!

  69. rachel 69

    That’s just weird that the woman was so offended by ‘NOT HER DINNER PARTNER’s behavior. That is just bizarre.
    Good for you, I probably would have done the same thing, or been all passive aggressive and said in a loud voice ‘isn’t it obnoxious when people can’t mind their own business and have to interrupt other’s dinners with their asinine rude loud mouth behavior.”

    or something. ;-)

  70. Kyddryn 70

    I believe the point of dining out socially is to enjoy the company of friends and family, to get to know someone better, and to enjoy a meal. How one enjoys the meal is entirely subjective. Dieting shouldn’t have to be awkward – if the dieter isn’t eyeing one’s entree with tears of regret in his/her eyes, than why does it matter what or if they order?

    I would have found her vitriol over something so inconsequential to be more distressing than your apropos response, and I don’t know if I would have said anything or simple been quietly mortified.

    Thank you, thank you for releasing the inner looney and telling that woman “enough!” I am surprised others in the restaurant didn’t applaud.

    Shade and Sweetwater,

  71. Good for you! As my mother says, she probably had bile for breakfast:)

    Can you imagine being that miserable that you have to talk about someone else in that manner?

  72. Tara 72

    Bravo for saying something! And you did it very well. You didn’t tear her a new one and go into long details and life stories, you just said “ENOUGH!” and the point was made. Again, bravo! :)

  73. Kristen 73

    OMG – what a horrid dinner mate for that poor man. She obviously needs a life!
    Good for you!!

  74. Sandie 74

    LOL and good for you for speaking up. If someone had spoken up to this woman sooner in life, perhaps she wouldn’t be so nosey and self-involved with micro-managing what and how others are eating. Obviously she needs to get a life.

  75. Claudia 75

    Dude, you rule. Good for you for having the balls to put that beeyotch in her place. Seriously, why do people need to look past their own insecurities and issues and harp on those of others (based on opinion, to boot!)? Idiots. All of them. I am SO proud of you for sticking it to her. Sheesh. The nerve.

  76. Ann 76

    I love that you did what you did… and your story gave me the giggles. I also wish you had been with me on the commuter bus yesterday afternoon, where I spent an hour and a half listening to two teen-aged girls smack and pop chewing gum as if they were training for a new olympic event requiring jaw strength. They were sitting in front of me and it was LOUD.

  77. heather 77

    wow. good for you. i think she just had personal problems. eating out shouldn’t mean gorging yourself – cuz really that’s not fun either. who knows why people can’t just mind their business and be happy.

  78. Alanna 78

    Cathy, let me just tell you how awesome I think you are. You have no idea how often I have wished I had the guts to do what you did. Way to go! :)

  79. Flea 79

    My mother-in-law’s a lot like that. She’s also the one who sends every single thing back. Nothing is ever right. And you know what? I think the staff know she’s there, because half the time something IS wrong. They probably spit in her food, too. Drives me NUTS. You absolutely did the right thing.

  80. How irritating! That’s great that you had the nerve to say something.

  81. Lori 81

    I’ve been reading your blog for awhile, and love it!

    Thank you for having the guts to tell someone to just stop it. I have personally done this a few times in movie theaters, and it really does work.

    As for the woman, my guess is that she was projecting her own issues with food/diet onto this woman. I find that when people talk this way about others it is almost always an issue they have with themselves and by beating someone else down, they feel better. Sad but true.

  82. I wish I could have seen that! Dude, that is so awesome that you put that horrible woman in her place with a single word.

    It’s no secret that I need to lose weight. A LOT of weight. And I’ve dealt with pressure from friends and family to indulge when we eat out or during the holidays. “Come on” they’ll say, “you deserve a treat.” What they don’t know is that I give myself treats, and I’m trying to make the choice to eat healthy to fuel my body not for the indulgence of it–that’s what got me so fat in the first place.

    I hate people who act like this. She has no idea why that woman made the choices she did and it doesn’t matter. It was none of her business. She clearly needed to shut the hell up.

  83. Kate 83

    I actually cheered when I heard what you finally did!
    That woman was the only person showing the bad manners.
    Maybe she’s just an angry person. Maybe she had a bad day. Maybe she’s going through menopause. Maybe she’s just a bitch on wheels. At least she shut the hell up.

  84. KathyB. 84

    Ohhhh, you have ALL the fun ! Usually our dinner is interrupted by cell phone discussions. However, when we were dining out recently, the phone of the diner next to us rang..and the lady turned to us and apologized for the interruption, then turned her phone off!(that was a first for us )

    Good on you ! KathyB.

  85. Tanya 85

    Bravo! I’m so glad you got to the point where you had to shut that woman up. Somebody needed to do it. The other lady, who was obviously just watching her diet, wasn’t doing anything wrong. This rude lady is just a busy body.

    By the way, there have been times where I haven’t taken part in the appetizers/bread and nobody has thought me rude for doing so. And so what if I order a dinner salad or grilled chicken? I eat what I want.

  86. Laura 86

    There are so many common reasons to not drink alcohol (especially for a woman, duh) that I cannot imagine finding it weird in the first place, let alone feeling the need to comment loudly. What a weird-o.

    If I had been with you I would have fallen off of my chair laughing.

  87. Tipper 87

    You Go Girl!! Glad you got to eat in peace!

  88. You’re my hero. I’m too passive aggressive to say anything though my goal in life is to get over that. I would have harrumphed loudly enough to get my point across but would have been too chicken shit to actually say anything for fear of confrontation.

  89. Paula 89

    I bet the dining companion of said woman had to grip his chair to keep him from standing up and cheering you with a loud “bravo”! In fact, he probably had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. Good for you for voicing what I imagine many others have wanted to do.

    Also, falling under the catagory of obnoxious are folks who talk LOUDLY on their cell phones at restaurants. Now, I can totally understand taking a call during dinner … what if the babysitter is trying to get a hold of you. Or if you are waiting to hear the outcome of a birth or surgery. But for some reason, folks like to shout into their phones to everyone can hear them. UGH!

  90. vanessa 90

    Some people are unbelievable. I’m glad you said something.

  91. Jen M 91

    No! You didn’t! I Love you! The whole time I read this post I was more and more stunned that someone would CARE so much about what another person (a stranger!!) was eating/drinking…my God – how bizarre!

    I just love that you said that. Seriously. Girl/Blogger crush is ON.

  92. OMG! That woman obviously has issues about food. She probably feels guilty about her own inability to moderate her eating habits and resents anyone who does.

    If I were there, I would have taken a more passive-aggressive route and said just a *little* too loud exactly what I said above. You’re a braver woman than I. I like your style!

  93. Good for you! That woman needed to be brought back to reality.

    Personally I’ve also been to a restaurant with a friend who didn’t eat, but that didn’t keep me from eating. It was her choice not to eat, but she wanted to come, so… I ate!

  94. B 94

    Simply put…I despise loud talkers. No matter what they are talking about. Well done.

  95. LMAO. Did you see my post late last week entitled “I Hate People”. Pretty much the same experience but in a museum…and with boogers…

  96. Hmmm…must read some Renovation Therapy. Boogers and museums! A true recipe for misanthropism.

    This story is just bizarre! I bet the other diners all silently applauded when you told that woman to shut up.

  97. So this woman spent more time dissecting what a total stranger was eating than she did on enjoying her own food? Imagine if this was your mother. I did not know there was a rule about minimum dining requirements.

  98. I am amazed that this tale gets over 90 comments. You must have really told it well.
    I hope nobody watch me eat. I never have wine. Now I eat very small portions. I would give her something to talk about.

  99. MsMVNJ 99

    Ooooh, what a wackjob….whatever happened to live and let live?

    Find her, I’ll play with my food….THAT’LL give her something to talk about ;-)

  100. Alicia 100

    LOL…I am cheering for you, nicely done!!! Did everyone else cheer for you too? I like the part of the wild boar now looking like the deer in headlight-ish.

  101. Bunny 101

    People can be freaky Cathy, trust me I know I work in a restaurant. We had a lady who was one of the wealthier women in town, her and her huband own a grocery chain. They were in our non smoking section all by themselves, it was late right before closing, they never come in together when we’re busy. One of the servers was cleaning off a table ACROSS the room from they’re table and she asked the server to stop cleaning it till after they we’re done eating. Talk about somebody who gets they’re own way all the time!! Your lady needs to get a life, talk about being rude! She was out to dinner with her poor husband and couldn’t talk to him about anything but another customer????!!!!

  102. I Love you posts!! You’re speaking up for us!

    I hate that, too!!

  103. jules 103

    Just thinking of your last post.(re: love/hate/blog)..
    Thank you for your comment on “hot off the Press”…however, your comment sooooo did not match my post…perhaps you should speak to whomever is commenting on your behalf..I’m just sayin’

  104. Lex the mom 104

    Huge kudos to you for that. Maybe next time the freaky lady will think twice about blabbering on about someone else she doesn’t know & will never see again. I don’t know if that’s boredom or something else, but it would have driven me nuts, too. I don’t know that I would have taken it as long as you did.

    I think I may have said something like “Why does it concern you so much what someone you don’t know is doing at their table?” Maybe she’s one of those compulsive complainers – she didn’t have anything on her own table to complain about, so she chose the other table.

    You get to experience some of the most interesting things! That’s why I keep coming back – & the food, of course the food (and the writing – it’s engaging). Heh.

  105. Ummm…..yikes.

    Sounds like she was a bit nuts, but it also sounds a like there were a few loose canons in the restaurant that night.

    Cathy darling, there are a lot of crazies out there. If you let them, they will drive YOU BATTY.

    Smile and breath in the California air…

  106. Good job. More people and more public gathering spots need mothers of some spunk to take over and demand order, it’s a crazy world. I’m glad she shut up which confirms she was just rude not crazy; a crazy lunatic venting woman might have gone off on you but The Wild Boar has connections and knows about 4 point restraints so even if it would’ve become a scene for the local news; ya’ll could’ve managed just fine. I’m sure of that.

  107. Raina 107

    Cathy, Amen sister, it was better you than me, I can never sit there and watch someone act like that, I am known for saying things in those situations, just cannot handle it…I would have probably said “Really, are you seriously going there, is your life that boring that you have to worry about what other people are eating…Wow”

  108. Meg 108

    Too bad I wasn’t there! I weigh & measure everything I eat. No bread! No grains! No sugar! Great fodder for control freaks! Good for you!

  109. Harmony 109

    You go girl! That is the most awesome and amazing thing I have ever heard!! I have no idea what that ladies problem was, but I bet her hubby got an ear full on the way home…LOL poor guy! I bet his soul did a little dance around his heart when you put that woman in her place!!

  110. I applaud you for your courage. I don’t know what’s wrong with the woman, why she needed to be heard on things that are not her business. Why can’t she just enjoy her own dinner and not mind the other person’s dinner? Oh geez, she must have been infuriating.

  111. grace 111

    oh cathy, i just love you and the fact that you put that woman in her place. i’m surprised you didn’t get a round of applause from the rest of the diners. if i had been there, i might’ve started the wave in your honor. :)

  112. Good work. You go girl!

    Also, look at how many comments you have here! You’re a rock star! Woot!

  113. Oh man, I had a friend like that woman who would comment loudly on every female she thought had a boob job. She did these theatrical whispers which were annoying and obvious and I think she did it for attention. And jealousy.

    You are rapidly becoming my hero with all this not taking shit you’re doing.

  114. WOW … I probably would have done the very same thing.

  115. Psychgrad 115

    Geez Cathy – You have some of the craziest experiences with people.

    This woman sounds very ignorant. What if the other woman had medical issues that restricted what she could eat/drink?

    If I go out to eat with a friend who is overly picky or cheap, I do feel some level of annoyance – depending on the extent of it. But why someone at a neighbouring table would even care or notice is beyond me.

  116. noobcook 116

    The poor, poor husband – must be hard for him to live with someone who is so critical & complain-y all the time :P Your writings are such interesting reads :)

  117. Rita 117


    my girlfriends and me got shushed once…and we were really giggling a bit too loudly (not to mention the words “cute butt” being used repeatedly in our conversation)…but it was a pretty loud place, everybody’s being loud! :p

    a lady stared at us with pure hatred…and my friend who saw that actually confronted her and went into a huge argument with her (if you like it quiet, eat at your own freaking home! or something to that effect hehe)

    i admired her courage as lil miss timid (namely me) wud probably end up paying that lady’s dinner LOL

  118. so here’s what i think – since you put it out there… but perhaps mine is not the popular opinion…

    i think that a woman like you described here in this post is an opportunity for us to learn a real lifes lesson.

    what she had to say to her dining partner had no bearing on you. and even if you were cosmicly right about her unattractive behavior, it’s your ego getting in the way. it’s the ego that makes us think that we are better than anyone – or that certain behavior is right or wrong.

    i think the higher path is to just shut up yourself. (i say this with no anomosity – i’m just typing away so don’t take this wrong, ok?) and that in the end, that is a more peaceful existence for you and the people around you.

    i am 47 – a good bit older than you i am sure. i have learned the hard way. these days i fight less, what i believe to be right – i believe it to be only right for me. i give my opinion less. because it DOESN’T MATTER.

    just let people be who they are. don’t try to teach them a lesson. it kinda doesn’t work…

    the seemingly miserable woman at the table next to you…? imagine what it must be like to be that kind of person. to have that kind of outlook… so that is where compasson comes in on your end. and that is big.

    so here i am giving you MY opinion. (hee)

    love your blog and you. keep up the great work!

  119. fantastic! I can’t believe you did that LMAO. You know she went home and took it out on her husband, right? Wow. No insight here– I have no idea why it mattered to her so much. I don’t drink wine (gasp! am I going to be allowed back here?), so I wonder if I’ve been committing some dining faux pas…

  120. Alisa 120

    I probably could not have resisted saying something either. I drive my family crazy sometimes.

  121. Terrie 121

    (The sound of thunderous applause)

    I absolutely LOVE that you spoke up! I’m right with you on this one. In the past I never would have said anything, but the older I get, the less capacity for others’ nonsense I possess. I probably would have said something sooner now! And you could have said so much more; she’s lucky you showed restraint.

  122. Mrs. L 122

    When we went to Manresa earlier this year, one of the gents at the table next to us just had to complain about EVERYTHING, not enough wine, not enough chocolate, last time he was there X was better. We were so glad when they left and questioned why, when he found the food so “not worthy” (his words) did he come there so often????? (I think this was his 6th or 7th time…we figured it was to try to impress his dates).

  123. melissa 123

    “I spun my chair around, which made a horrible noise and I said, “Enough!””



  124. Tracey 124

    You are hilarious!! You sound exactly like me (gosh — I hope that doesn’t come across as totally pat-self-on-the-back-ish). SOMEONE had to set this woman straight — hooray to you for being that someone. What a horrible woman!!

    And congrats to you also for FINALLY winning about traffic court. I followed your entire saga — absolutely glued to the page, enraged about the whole twisted string of events. I’m so glad you filed the appeal and fought your case. That judge, DA, and cop deserve a slap in the face for giving our justice system a bad name. I’m glad YOUR good name is cleared!!

  125. Good for you! Occasionally I reach the end of my rope and do something similar. It always leaves The Hubs and Darling Daughter open-mouthed in shock.

  126. I see that you and the hubby are pretty much like me and my hubby – I am always the one to take actions and to be called rude or something like that. :S
    I think you did an amazing thing. I’m sure people felt like applauding you, darling.

  127. Lara 127

    Oh my gosh, you ROCK for doing that! I heart you.

  128. Nancy 128

    LMAO!!! You crack me up! It does seem like you attract looneys!! How funny. I would have loved to see her face when you said that…I picture a cartoon character with the little hat and the square jaw and the fox stole thrown around her neck – stopped in mid-sentence. And her poor mouse of a husband (about half her size) with the bowl hat and brown suit! ROFL!!

  129. Luscious Lars Anderson 129

    Damn, Girlfriend! Ya’ll got me straight trippin’!

  130. Lynn 130

    Telling a nosey ninny in a single word how to behave in public?


    My best, Lynn

  131. yY18Megan 131

    this topic – what a great topic! Thank you a lot! We can buy essay choosing the essay writing.

  132. I learn something fresh everyday or get to read about other people’s experience which is why I love reading blogs.


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