Are You Sponge Worthy?


I have a friend (who does not even own a computer…I swear…she wants nothing to do with them) who calls me at least three weekends out of the month.  This has been going on for 10 years.  If you know me, then you know how much I hate the phone, preferring email.  With her I have no choice, she is computer-less.  Shouldn’t that be a red flag right there?

She lives in the same state I do, about 500 miles away.

She has two kids and is a stay-at-home-mom.  I’ve known her for years.  I wouldn’t say we were the “best of friends” but do have a fairly solid relationship.  I think.  Or thought.

Here’s the problem, over the years I’ve begun to notice a pattern.  She calls me only on weekends and only from her cell phone.  The connection is always bad.  She acts like she doesn’t notice it. 

I tell her to call me back using her land line but she always has a jillion excuses why she can’t.  However, if I offered to call her back on her land line it would be satisfactory.

In the beginning I didn’t even realize what was happening.  I have figured out, by process of elimination, she only wants to speak with me if she’s using her free cell phone weekend minutes.

When she does call on the weekend and if I do not answer, she’ll leave a message to return her call on her house phone, never the cell.  Or her message will say, “Okay, I’ll try again next weekend”.  WTH?

If I do call her back on her cell during the week she never answers.  Neee-ver  But if I immediately call her on her house phone after calling the cell, she’ll pick up immediately.  Yes, I have experimented.

I’m on to her.

I have concluded, I am not worthy of her highly prized weekday minutes and am only worth speaking to if it’s free and on the weekend!

I really haven’t decided how I feel about the situation other than the Wild Boar and I had a big laugh about it. 

It is funny but that level of cheapness has always bothered me.  Trust me when I tell you there is not a financial reason for her to be this way.  Her and her husband do quite well, and she tells me that frequently.  Maybe this is why they are doing so well?

It all reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Elaine finds out her favorite contraceptive, The Today Sponge, is being discontinued.  She runs around the city buying up all the Today Sponges she is able to get and becomes very, very selective with whom she is willing to use her contraceptive with.  It’s pretty hilarious.

So, I’m thinking “my friend” does not consider me “Weekday Minute Worthy”. 

Should I no longer take her weekend calls or should I continue being her Saturday or Sunday entertainment?

Can we categorize people into weekday or weekend minute worthy.  Well, obviously we can.

And doesn’t everyone just have a billion cell phone minutes anyway? 

What I Was Blogging About One Year Ago Today:  Extravagant Stupidity

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87 Comments

  1. Edina 1

    Some people are horribly mean – I invited my little sister up to visit. She said she couldn’t afford the fares to get here but she would love to visit. Rather than buy her the ticket I foolishly sent her a cheque. Next thing I knew she’s promising to come up at Easter and is going to a concert! My fault for not buying her the ticket instead I spose.
    I think we all think our meanness is normal and acceptable. We also have a friend who chats for hours if he’s got minutes to use up on his mobile, otherwise we don’t hear from him.
    I think this is just the way some people are. I don’t understand the not having a computer thing though!

  2. Hilary 2

    It seems like selfishness to me .. & I’d let it lapse .. it’s taking up too much of your time – for what? Friends are friends .. we don’t need to speak every week .. it’s like being tied to a job?! Unnecessary.

    Be cruel ..to be kind .. maybe she will re think .. but you’ll feel better and not anxious about the weekly call ..

    Good luck Cathy .. you’re too sensible to be taken in by this ‘friend’ ..

    Hilary: Be Positive Be Happy

  3. I hear you, I know what you’re saying. I’ve got a friend who does this thing and it annoys the beeswax out of me…I won’t go into it, too long. But I feel like she puts me way down the list…and I shouldn’t be down the bloody list!
    But this is my thinking. Life is short. Friends are few and far between. Friends can also have good phases and then be a bit out of it for a while. When my mate is being a bit of a pain and making me feel like crap, I just remember what I like about her in the first place and accept that this is who she is. I suppose I think that I know I have probably pissed her off (sorry legitimate Aussie polite vocabulary here) unknowingly a number of times over the years so I let it go (but the laughing with the husband really helps).

  4. First, please let me say the previous post’s recipe for roasted Tomato soup- DELICIOUS! I did make it for dinner and it is sooooo good, I will be making it again and my Hubby, the foodie in the family also liked it very much.

    As far as your friend, well, not liking the phone myself I can understand NOT answering the phone, but this limited days phone stuff does seem to be a bit on the cheap side and if a friend is valued, the paltry amount added to the phone bill while talking to someone who is special is not usually a consideration in these times, especially if your friend is an average American and NOT destitute. Apparently there is a price and value on this person’s list of friends and priorities. Hope I am wrong, after all, she is your FRIEND, isn’t she?

  5. Laura 5

    It’s not that easy to realized that you might be on someone’s “B” list as far as friendships go.
    But, then again, it helps to know so that you can stop making her a priority.
    She can still be a friend, but maybe you are investing more energy than needed and you can nuture other friendships that could use more of your time.
    (Now that is MY head talking)
    My heart says…give her a break. It’s a quirk. She’s a friend. She’s weird about her minutes.
    We are all weird about something.
    I have a very wealthy friend who will hunt you down if you owe her two bucks for a bottle of wine she bought for a co-worker.
    It’s hysterical.
    I love her anyway.

  6. I feel ya on this situation…I have a very close friend, we have been friends since we were 15…and she can only call me during the work week while I am at work because her husband won’t let her talk to me when he is there. Weird, I know…but I had to realize it is what it is, and although it is not the situation I would prefer, as a friend…I have to understand without comprehension.

    We have limited daytime minutes, but we have free nights and weekends!

  7. We all have our idiosyncracies, although I’ll admit the cheap, cheap folks get to me … because they are cheap, but at what cost? It just comes down to how much this irritates you, how much you value this friend, and whether you can let it go enough to enjoy those bad connection calls with her (or be willing to call her).

    Shirley

  8. First off, love the Seinfeld reference. I knew this was going to be a good post just from the title. And on to your friend — I would just evaluate how much it bothers you and whether or not it does enough to cause you to actually not want to be friends with her any more. My mother-in-law got so upset at one of her friends because they bought us a very inexpensive wedding gift (and are very well off financially), she seriously was considering confronting her over it. In the end, she decided that this woman was a good friend to her and that she would just try and ignore her cheapness. But she is also still bringing it up 6 months later!

  9. Barbie with a T 9

    You are very clever in figuring this whole thing out. I suppose you could just return her call on the cell phone during the week, and she probably won’t answer, but you can just leave a message saying you are sorry you missed her. Pretty soon after a few “misses” maybe she will figure it out.

  10. That’s really tacky. She should want to talk to you any time!

  11. Leslie 11

    Maybe she will ask to take you to dinner with her gift certificate and ask for you to leave the tip

  12. “Weekday Minute Worthy”…hahahahaha!

    You always have the greatest stories. I think that’s why I love reading your blog so much. :)

  13. deeba 13

    Get out of here lady. Save the free weekend entertainment for your family!! LOL…what a hilarious post this is Cathy! I don’t feel like hanging up on this one…

  14. imom 14

    I have a friend who occasionally calls me on her cell phone. Between her accent, her laughing and the connection I can rarely understand a word she says. I just nod (which she can’t see) say Uh-uh and laugh a lot. When my husband asks what we talked about I tell him I have no idea!

    Great story and I loved that Seinfeld episode! Good stuff.

  15. Maybe the economic situation is hitting her hard. I wouldn’t spend too much time on it. You have cooking and recipe sharing to do!

  16. Weekday worthy.. you are funny. Don’t let it bother you.. don’t sweat the small stuff. Not worth it. If she makes you feel less than, not worth your thinking energy. If she thinks you are worth it, and you are, she will eventually call during the week, the weirdo.

  17. My aunt does this, but they’re very poor and I only hope she continues to call me on weekends for many years to come.
    As for your friend… meh. It’s good to know where you stand, yes?

  18. tipper 18

    Your life could be a Seinfeld episode : ) and you have the wit to pull it off! I think your friend is extremely cheap and kinda uncaring. She is actually wanting you to put more into the relationship thank she does-financially and with your busy weekend time too.

  19. What is interesting here is that you are worthy enough to get a call each weekend, yet not enough to use her free minutes on. Hmmm. I say just call her out on it, in a fun way…”I noticed that you only call me on your cell…using your free minutes? HA-HA-HA. Perhaps if she realizes that her ‘jig’ is up she will not be so anal about it. All of us have our little quirks I guess…some more than others…LOL

  20. Shawn 21

    Bwahahaha!

    I’m just glad you aren’t the Soup Nazi and you share your recipes with us!

  21. I am often a weekend caller. It does vary, and I don’t have my “weekday worthy” list.
    Maybe it is actually that you are Weekend Worthy, because she wants to talk to you on a weekend without the worry of how many minutes it will be. She wants to talk unfettered by time restrictions.
    I personally do not have long distance on my phone (budget cuts) so I make my calls on the cell. I usually call my Dad on a weekend because it could be a 5 minute call or it could be a 50 minute call. (Though I don’t avoid weekday calls to him)
    Currently a lot of my weekday minutes are spent on trying to talk to a friend of mine who is 1000 miles away and getting chemo. If I can get her, I will talk as long as I can. I don’t call on weekends because her family is with her and can spend time with her then.
    I wouldn’t over think this one. Just accept this as a quirk of who she is.

  22. First of all thanks for a hilarious post. I was smiling to myself the whole time. Second, just call her back on the cell phone and leave a message. simple.

  23. How much would you miss hearing from her? If the answer’s ~not much~ perhaps you should be busy when she calls…

  24. marcy 25

    wow, that does really suck. I know my BFF lives about 8 hrs from me, and we rely on computer , cell or reg. landline. Yousay she doens’t have a computer either. Hmm, maybe she doens’t deem you minute worthy.. sounds a bit rude..

  25. Candy 26

    I don’t know…I have a gazillion minutes, but not everyone does. My best friend calls me every few days and we talk at length, but every once in a while she’ll say, I have to keep this short, I’m almost over my minutes. And another friend who doesn’t even have a land line – we try to keep it to a minimum some times.

    Going over your minutes costs a lot more than the plan does…so I can kinda understand. But what I don’t get is, why won’t she call you from the land line at her house. THAT’s a different story.

  26. Trisha 27

    The two sides of me have two replies. First, the little devil in me says that you should suddenly be very, very busy during the weekends and tell her that you can only talk on weekdays. This, of course, could mean that you will never hear from her again. The little devils says “good riddance!”

    The little angel says that you should rise about this – be a bigger person than she of the cheap cell phone minutes. If you like this woman and would enjoy talking to her even if she didn’t use the free minutes then just be satisfied that she is calling you at all. You never know what is going on financially with her. Maybe there is a good reason she is calling on her free minutes.

  27. dawn 28

    Is she sponge worthy? LOL!
    Very funny.
    I needed that laugh. I do not think she is sponge worthy if she’s draining you. No more christmas cookies for her. If you’re around to asnwer the cal then do it, if not then don’t.

  28. dawn 29

    I saw dump her and move on. When someone values cheapness over friendship I have found they are too quirky. Since it’s not a financial issue and is really a cheapness, say bye-bye. I had a friend who did this and well it just wasn’t worth it.

    People who say to keep her around are probably guilty of the same stuff.

  29. I guess it just depends on how much you value the friendship.
    I would be happy if my long distance friends would call me occasionally.
    Seems I’m always the one doing the calling.

  30. Wow, that’s a tough one. I hate the phone too…so I would probably wouldn’t call her back for a few months at least, I am that bad. I forget, get busy, yadda yadda yadda… It’s probably not YOU specifically that she doesn’t think worthy, she just sounds cheap. I would bet your not the only one she does this too. But it is annoying…why do we let these little things irk us?

  31. Daniel 32

    True cheapness is a disease that only becomes more petty and infiltrates every aspect of their life as try to get everything for free. It’s a quirk I loathe. Since she is doing well…they are the worst ones.

    Frankly, the friendship, if you can call it that, ISN’t Worth it!

  32. Scott 33

    Can we talk about the wild boar?? Mmmm wild boar!

  33. Debra 34

    It’s always better to be kind and give people the benefit of the doubt. In the overall scheme of things it is a big deal though!!! :-)

  34. I wasn’t even aware that calling is cheaper on weeends–that’s how out of it I am!!

  35. I’m going to cancel my land line and go strictly to a cell phone. Will I become a weekend caller too? Oh no….

  36. What would Elayne do????

    Who cares if you are not weekday minute worthy, as long as you are “sponge worthy!”.

  37. Bob 38

    I’m not sure how I would react to that. Probably the wrong way. 😉

  38. Pam 39

    I can’t believe she is like that. I would stop answering the phone on the weekends…maybe she’ll get the hint that you are on to her and her cheap ways.

  39. Elyse 40

    Wow, how stingy! I mean, that’s just ridiculous. I’d talk to my friends no matter what time of the day or day of the week. Friends are friends, regardless of whether the minutes are free. You have every right to feel weird about this discovery. However, you’re also right that this is totally laugh-worthy and she deserves a bit of mocking for acting this way!

  40. Are your discussions of any substance? Do you look forward to hearing from her? If not, stop taking her calls. Text her and say you can no longer accept weekend calls due to your cell phone plan! LOL

  41. That is really strange. It’s just a phone call how hard is that? I have a friend who does not do e-mail at all. It drives me crazy! I hate the phone!

    I have a few friends that totally dumped me after my cancer diagnosis. Went through a whole year of surgery and chemo and not a word or an e-mail. I guess with some people you are not worthy at all even when you are sick.
    BUT it sure did show me who my true friends really are!

  42. KAYOLA 43

    OH BOY! I really get bugged when there are those friends YOU have to work harder being their friend than they are willing to be yours…I have friends like that…and IT BUGS! I ♥ that you called her out…too bad she doesn’t have a computer so she could see just how annoying she really is…

  43. Mary 44

    You’ve have me smiling again. When you’re not teaching us to cook, you’re teaching us to laugh.

  44. Molly 45

    Is it possible, with the state of the economy, that your friend has fallen on hard times and needs to economize her money a little bit? Perhaps this is difficult for her to discuss with you, and she needs to save her free minutes for people she has to speak to (like her husband and kids?)

    My mom always says “If a problem boils down to money, then you’re really okay.” Money problems are fixable whereas other problems, like cancer, not so much. Perhaps since you know this is an issue, you can call her. If you can afford it. :-)

  45. elra 46

    LOL, I have one friend like that, very old fashion, and don’t own a computer, not because she can’t afford it. She just not in to it. She also loves to call, like you I hate phone call, unless if they are my immediate family (I know, I am that bad). Anyway, if it’s me, I just take the phone only if I am in the mood to talk.

    Yeah, I remember that episode. LOL.
    Cheers,
    elra

  46. Linze 47

    My vote is to never take her weekend calls, at least not for a while. Call her on a Wednesday afternoon and tell her that it’s the ONLY time that you can talk.

    After all, you should have some fun with this.

    Or, you could just print out a copy of this blog post and send it to her.

    Now THAT would be fun.

  47. marinazar 48

    Since she has chosen to communicate in this archaic manner I would suggest she begin writing you letters opposed to calling. =]

  48. Laura 49

    I don’t understand people not having free long distance on their home phone, honestly. We’ve had it for eons.

    As a stay at home mom myself, I would never talk to another SAHM on the weekend. That’s when my husband is home! Now if my friend worked, I would feel differently, obviously, but most SAHMs I know prefer to do family stuff on the weekend. Which makes her/them (maybe it’s her husband’s issue?) triply cheap!

  49. First, I’m with you, I hate talking on the phone. I would be upset too that she does not pick up the cell during weekdays. Don’t answer for couple week-ends in a row. And my week-ends are too precious to spend time on the phone. I want to spend it with my family, not on the phone with a friend that lives miles away.

  50. Jennabee 51

    I love you!

  51. I love your take on it but I’m afraid I wouldn’t be able to NOT ask. I would just ask and then hopefully laugh my arse off with a friend.

    And hey, you of the stealthy eye on my whipped potatoes…I spoke out of turn. Not my blender but my handmixer and it works wonders, well, when it works. Gluton-who?

  52. Wendy S 53

    Dump her. She’s too pathetic. Because she touts off frequently about doing well she needs to step up. Cheapness starts out minor but only gets worse as you get older. It’s excruciating to be around people who are like this. They make it horrible everytime you try to do anything, like go to a restaurant. I say get out while you can, the relationship has been devalued.

  53. This reminds me of those Gallo commercials “and how do you think I got so rich?” I think she needs to start reading your blog even if it means she has to go to the library to get online then she can start with this post! Some people are so weird. What if you called her on it in a sly and joking way to see if she gets it. Answer “hello this is your weekend minutes friend.”

  54. Weekday minute worthy-bwahahahah! I got right away where you were headed with this-I know people like that. Course, we use our computer to ‘talk’ to most people in our family as we don’t have long distance service on our home phone. I guess I would chalk it up to her quirkiness, but if it is really chaffing your hide, I would just leave messages on the cell-she might get the hint (after counting her millions)

  55. Julie 56

    she’s no friend

  56. Biz 57

    Don’t take her calls anymore on the weekends and see if she’ll call on the week days!

    I had a friend once, and I didn’t even notice it until my husband (then boyfriend) pointed it out to me, was that she only called me when she needed something: watch her children, hang with her when her husband worked nights, pick up dry cleaning. If her husband was around, I never saw or talked to her.

    Then I moved 40 miles away. Now this is a person I talked/saw 5-6 times a week! Once I moved, she never called me once. Not to see how the move went, how I was doing. And that was almost 8 years ago!

    I think you should let this “friend” go!

  57. Marjie 58

    I have the minimum cell package, although the kids who are in college, who also have minimum minute packages, call each other on “the network” for about 3000 minutes per month. I won’t give out my cell number, and won’t call anyone except from my land line. If they’re worth calling, I pay for the call, and make the call when I’m not doing something else, like trying to avoid other cars. I wouldn’t waste my valuable weekend time with the Wild Boar and Hooligans talking to someone who only wants to talk if it’s free!

  58. You’re far more graceful than I am…I’d have called her on it once I’d realized what was up.

    I do wonder though, what if she really needed to speak to you – needed an ear/shoulder/friend in a most desperate way and you mentioned that you could only talk to her if she called you back using her cell phone during the week and between 9-5.

    Friendship shouldn’t be limited to the free hours on a calling plan.

  59. nancy sternberg 60

    what if you answer her call, listen without responding for a few minutes, say you must leave now, say goodbye, no explanation, hang up. and repeat weekend after weekend after weekend.

  60. Ahahahah! This was funny! I also hate that kind of cheapness, I really don’t know what to tell you, other than to laugh a bit more about it!

  61. Kate 62

    So, she doesn’t have a computer and will never see this post, is that it?
    I laughed as soon as I saw the title and came right over. Of course I remember the sponge worthy episode!! A classic. And you’re right, this is exactly what she’s doing to you. Tell me this, do you enjoy the phone chats with her at all? Do you enjoy her as a friend?
    This kind of cheapness bothers me a bit, too. I have a relative who is very very similar. They have way more money than we do yet she is so cheap. On everything.

  62. Catt 63

    Give me your number and I’ll call you during the week…I’ll even use the precious “daytime minutes” on you!! I say don’t waste your time on people that don’t treat you as worthy!!!

    You are the BOMB!!!

  63. I’m a total call screener. It’s not because I don’t adore the person who’s calling, but I’ll screen best friends and family ALL THE TIME and then send them a text message a few minutes later. It has nothing to do with minutes, sadly, just that I HATE talking on the phone…particularly with those friends who want to talk for hours at a time when you can smell dinner starting to burn. Does this make me a bad person? Maybe…?

  64. Many years ago I was dating someone who always made plans on weekdays. Once I suggested we see a movie on a Friday night and he told me he didn’t think he was ready for “weekend dating.” Apparently I wasn’t weekend worthy. That was the end of him, and it should be the end of her.

  65. i guess this is the reason they are doing so well? she’s chintzy on things like phone bills.

  66. I’ll admit I’m a bit of a bridge-burner, but it’s behaviors like this that make me that way. My tactic would be to just quit calling her and take her calls if/when I feel like it. If she wants to talk to me badly enough, she’ll call during the week. Or not. Whatever – no big loss.

  67. Bunny 68

    No computer???!! These people are financially doing very well and they don’t have a computer and are afraid to use cell phone minutes?? Somebody that cheap would get on my last nerve, Now I’m curious as to what else she’s cheap with!

  68. Donna S 69

    Doesn’t sound like you enjoy the relationship much anyway. I think I wouldn’t answer for a while. Maybe only answer every couple of months & see what happens. When you do answer just tell her your weekends are sooo busy it is hard to talk. Let her decide if your friendship is worth working harder on.

  69. Dea 70

    I don’t know… I can see a couple of sides to this… I think I would be thrilled to have ANY long distance friend who was thoughtful enough to call me 3 times a month. I’m lucky if my friends call 3x a year. Friendships are hard to keep, especially long distance ones and I could cut a friend some slack. Also, I am involved in financial counseling and there are A LOT of people out there who look like they have money, but are mortaged to the hilt and in debt up to their ears. I can respect someone who is trying their best to live with in their means.

  70. Louise 71

    Sponge worthy. Was that crazy or what?! I guess you are realizing the intrinsic value in other people’s values. Sometimes it is just not so pretty.

  71. Julie 72

    Oh goodness, I don’t even know what to say. It cracks me up that you’ve “experimented”!

  72. Paula 73

    Love the Seinfeld reference! Ha! Hmmm … perhaps she has you on her friends/family/freebie plan? At least she’s not faking static sounds in order to get you to call back!

  73. God that’s annoying. When friends put cheapness before the basic necessities of the friendship, it really hurts. It would be one thing if she really didn’t have the money, but to making this kind of a choice is pretty pathetic.

  74. darlene 75

    You could be talking about my little brother! He doesn’t even have a land line and never talks to me on his cell. I only talk to him when he’s at my mom’s house using her phone. BUT I do forgive him as he’s my brother and is a single dad with 2 kids to support.

    BTW, I did my graduate degree at UC Davis and love reading your references about the town. It’s quite a protective community, isn’t it?

  75. Oh, Cathy…I have RELATIVES (even my own mother!!) that refuse to call ME, because they know I have free cell phone minutes!! And, then, they get all huffy when I don’t call them all the time.

    It’s maddening.

    Not to mention, I usually call them from my home phone, because our plan includes unlimited calls.

    Ugh.

    I don’t know what the right answer is.

  76. Patty 77

    Regarding your (sponge worthy) friend: May she be kept in a Folgers coffee can long after she leaves the Earth.
    Cheapskates are so annoying. And cheap.

  77. HoneyB 78

    LOL, I JUST saw that episode again not too long ago. Yeah, that would bug me. If I’m not good enough to be a call any day of the week or any phone line…wth? Why bother with me at all?

  78. Tara 79

    Maybe its something ingrained in her. Maybe she has a super busy week. Maybe she lies about her financial situation. The point is that you ae getting a call at all! If she didnt want to talk she wouldnt call you. Just dont make her a priority and simply enjoy the convo you have with her. Just cut her off after 10 mins and maybe she will call you during the week eventually. Good luck!

  79. stephanie 80

    I’d chalk it up to a quirk. At least she calls you and if you enjoy the conversations you have, than it’s worth it. Some people are cheap, that’s just the way they are and if that’s one of the many things they do to save money so they can have a financially better lifestyle good for them.

  80. wkf 81

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!! I had a friend like that. Emphasis on HAD. It is interesting how much I don’t miss the relationship. Send cards at the holidays.

  81. Kim 82

    My only sister is like that, she lives in my state and her husband is a lawyer!!!

  82. Gotta love Seinfeld. Sounds like your friend is cheap…but my degree of annoyance would depend on whether she’ll use her “sponge” on other friends or not. Actually..forget that – bad extension of the analogy.

  83. Omjane 84

    Okay Im guilty.
    I do this same thing, but not because theyre at the bottom of the calling list, but because I like spending time talking to the person.
    I actually do it to my very own mother, and to my sister, who I consider to be my best friend. I don’t have unlimited minutes, and the one time I went over, I was charged 4 times my usual phone bill.
    I see where your friend is coming from. And afterall, conserving is quite sheik nowadays. Regardless of the amount of cash youve got.
    But seriously, no computer? What century is she living in. 😉

  84. iride 85

    hmmm, maybe she does this with everyone she knows, not just you. Maybe that’s just the way she uses her cell phone.

  85. Nicole 86

    You are hilarious! I totally remember the episode and often feel I am not “_____ worthy” of certain friends as well. What is up with that? Frankly, if it happens too often, I start pulling away. I can’t let myself be that cheapened.

  86. Bea 87

    I liked that episode as well and can relate to your friend. I don’t use my house phone that much so I have a limited phone package where I have unlimited incoming minutes and 500 outgoing minutes. So, if folks want to talk to me for long, they either call me or we talk or the weekend. Also, my weekdays tend to be taken up by family time and responsibilites, so weekends are usually the best time for me to talk…just a thought from the other side…but if it’s really bugging you, perhaps you should not answer for awhile.