If you need someone to re-grout your shower, make this cake.
If you need an eighteen foot trench dug in your yard, make this cake.
If you need horse manure shoveled, yes, make this cake.
If you have any disgusting task or duty to perform, you will have the unfair advantage of getting it done by OFFERING up this cake!
Just yesterday, I needed the floors washed. It's now done because I MADE THIS CAKE!
Oh trust me, this is another ridiculous, preposterous dessert. You will have supreme power over anyone you feed this to. Isn't that what you want...power? I beg you to try this Butterscotch-Apple Cake. Actually, I command you, since I have this cake and have all the power! Ha!
Now, go find a REALLY nasty chore you want completed, make this cake and once it starts baking and the aromas start wafting throughout the house you will have all authority. Oh yes you will. Spouses are the most likely candidates to succumb to your new found power trip.
Let's get to it.
Here they are...all the ingredients you need to begin your authoritative reign. Vegetable oil, sugar, eggs, flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, cinnamon, vanilla, apples, pecans, butterscotch morsels and caramel sauce.
This is going to be good and you will hardly expend much energy making it.
Let's mix up the dry ingredients first.
Yes, get out your giant vat of all-purpose flour. I know you have one.
Add 2 cups of all-purpose flour to a mixing bowl.
Clamor to get your Clabber...
Add 1-1/2 teaspoons of baking powder to the bowl.
Think about what it says on this package...for baking, cleaning and deodorizing...ummm, that's weird don't you think? Put it in your cake and then go clean the toilet with it! Very, very strange.
1 teaspoon (of the toilet cleaner) baking soda will do.
Grab the salt.
1 teaspoon of salt gets added.
Now for the Canela Molida. I did not get this cinnamon in Mexico in case you were wondering.
1 teaspoon of cinnamon is the last of the dry ingredients.
Mix all of these up and set aside.
Now let's move on to the wet stuff.
Add 1 cup of vegetable oil to a mixing bowl.
Time for the sweet stuff! Yippee!
Add 2 cups of sugar to the oil.
This is Tweedledee and Tweedledum. They have no idea of their impending fate.
First add Tweedledee because Tweedledum is too lame to know what's going on.
Start mixing then add the other egg.
But notice how I'm using my hand-held mixer. I usually use my heavy-duty mixer for this cake. Stick with the heavy-duty mixer. That's all I'm going to say.
Now add the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients and mix until fully incorporated.
Can you tell which ones are the girls? I'll help you, the boys have stems (yes, I'm juvenile).
You will need 3 cups of Granny Smith apples (about 3-4 apples) peeled and chopped into small cubes.
Sometimes I feel like a nut. Sometimes I don't. But mostly I do.
1 cup of chopped pecans. First chop them and then fill up one cup. I know that can be confusing.
Add the apples, pecans and 1 teaspoon of vanilla to the already mixed batter and stir it all together; it will be very thick.
Add the batter mixture to a greased 9 x 13 pan.
Now for the good part. This is what makes this cake soooooooo over-the-top.
Sprinkle 1 cup of Butterscotch Chips over the batter. These are going to melt into the cake and make it astonishing.
Place the pan into a 350 degree oven for 55 minutes.
When it comes out of the oven, it will look like this.
Let the cake completely cool before cutting. It will be hard to wait, but you must.
Then get this. You do not need the high-end caramel for this cake. It's not necessary.
I love how this bottle says "Fat Free" on the label. Yeah, this is definitely diet food.
Now cut your slice and drizzle caramel over each piece as you serve it.
Then add some whipped cream and fall into a sugary, sweet coma.
You have to try this. You really do.
adapted from Taste of the South
1 cup vegetable oil
2 cups sugar
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1-1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 cups finely chopped, peeled apples
1 cup chopped pecans
1 cup butterscotch morsels
Garnish: caramel sauce and whipped cream
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
In a large mixing bowl, mix together oil and sugar. Add eggs, one at a time, beating after each addition. Add flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt and cinnamon; beat well. Stir in vanilla, apples and pecans. (Mixture will be thick).
Spread mixture evenly in a greased 9 x 13 -inch baking pan. Sprinkle butterscotch chips over top. Bake for 55 minutes.
Cool completely in pan. Garnish with caramel sauce and whipped cream.
This cake is so moist and rich it will taste like you slaved in the kitchen all day.
Your family will be eating out of your hand...I promise.