My Crazy Place


Ummmm…I have a serious problem.  It’s my kitchen utensil drawer.

Ridiculous isn’t it?

Okay, so I use the stuff in this drawer probably more than any other stuff in my house (except for the vacuum, toilet paper, my hairbrush, my toothbrush,) but you get it…this is a very busy place.  But just because it’s a highly popular spot doesn’t mean that it has to look like this?

I wonder what this says about me?  I’m not lazy (most of the time).  Am I organized-ly challenged?  My clothing closet doesn’t look like this.  My linen closet is actually quite immaculate.  The coat closet is somewhat decent.  My bookcase. Perfect.  The pantry, well let’s not go there.

Why is it that every nook and cranny of the kitchen has so many looming disasters?  It’s my favorite room in the house.

In this drawer alone it’s possible to sever a finger on a giant clever while searching for the muddler to make a Mojito.  It’s a chaotic, pitiful, disaster and I see no way of fixing it.

Do the ice cream scoops and four barbecue basting brushes need to be in the same drawer?  What about the cherry pit remover and the fish fillet knife.  I need a plan.


But look, here’s utensil drawer number two.  More trouble.

Senseless items in blissful togetherness…bamboo skewers, two fat skimmers, a phone charger, a pastry cutter and headphones.  My lameness is all very apparent here.

Now this cupboard looks somewhat decent right?  But this is only a view of the front row.

Behind the springform pan, the pie plates, the very large lobster steaming pot and the Cuisinart blades is another row of crapola.

Baking pans in every shape and size, cooling racks, Halloween partyware and an endless supply of mixing bowls are only some of the contraband that can be found in the elusive second row.

As you start pulling things out of this cabinet other unrelated paraphernalia can roll out and kill you instantaneously.  It really could.  I swear.  I’m not even joking.

Hopefully by exposing myself to the world I will be so embarrassed that I will once and for all get my kitchen together.

But yet another mindless conglomeration of crap…

China, root beer float glasses, ramekins in every size, a baby monitor we haven’t used in four years, a jar of pennies, coffee cups and you can’t see it but there is a bottle of vodka lurking in here as well.

What’s sad is, my hooligans are following in my foot steps.  Here is their kitchen drawer.  Every pencil from every birthday party they’ve attended since the year 2000 resides in this drawer.

It must be genetic.  Here’s their second kitchen drawer.  Thirty-eight pairs of scissors, 14 calculators and enough markers to re-color the Sistine Chapel.  At least their groupings are not so senseless.

Oh, but what’s this mess.  THIS IS NOT MY MESS.  This is the mess I blame for all my other kitchen messes.

This cabinet was once articulately, delightfully and thoughtfully arranged with my china, teapots and tapered candle holders.  All have since had to find other homes in my kitchen, causing over-crowding and kitchen cookware hostility everywhere else.

Slowly and deviously the Wild Boar in all of his sneakiness and trickery started taking over the shelves like this was some type of apothecary cabinet for the medically challenged.

My dishes were slowly replaced with nasal sprays, milk of magnesia, earwax removal kits and all sorts of vitamins and supplements that we never, ever take.

My ice cream bowls became containers for miniature packets of Advil and allergy relief pills.

Somehow he felt it was okay to violate the most precious real estate in the house.  My kitchen cabinets!

It’s not like we don’t have a plethora of bathroom cabinets that would happily house these medically misplaced objects.

I want my kitchen back. NOW!

Sorry I had to call you out honey.  It’s for the best.

Does anyone else have a crazy place in their house they want to recapture?

Post a Comment

11 Comments

  1. Sorry, but I think your mess looks like my “neat.” And those bamboo skewers? I have them too, but I don’t know why because I have the real metal ones too…Lordy.

    Reply
  2. It does not matter how many times I straighten the tupperware cupboard or the glass bowl cupboard. Mayhem follows suit. And I’ll take the rammekins off your hands if you need to make room!

    Reply
  3. eliza 3

    i love looking at someone else’s mess! are you throwing out the baby monitor already? :) my mess is up in the attic so they’re not so visible to the visitors of my home.

    Reply
  4. Farley 4

    Sister, I’m right there with you in the kitchen. I don’t have much cabinet space and only 4 shallow, narrow drawers. While I’d like everything to be organized by use ( I had my pantry items separated by cuisine for a short time), the utensil drawer is a hodge podge of culinary gadgets. And yes, I’ve been known to cut my finger or jab myself on a meat thermometer once or twice.

    Reply
  5. Kris 5

    Anyplace I’d like to recapture? Yes.

    My. Entire. Freaking. House.

    (That’s why we have two other blogs. My Husband’s Crap and My Kids Are Pigs. LOL!)

    Reply
  6. you are not alone, you are not alone… :)

    Reply
  7. And how is this challenge coming?

    Reply
  8. dawn 8

    This is so my life…I am so realting on so many levels!

    Reply
  9. hummmmm, I think actually we all live the same way! I don’t like disorganization, and I am becoming an organization junkie. But the upside to that, is more stuff fits in smaller spots! And I know my house will not grow, just my list of needed stuff.

    Reply
  10. Jamie 10

    Kathy, I would love to come shopping in your drawers. You have some neat stuff.
    Most of mine are relatively neat…until you get to the bottom and largest drawer…….then look out!

    Reply
  11. Susan 11

    If someone has a solution I would dearly love to hear it – my kitchen has the same chaos!

    Reply

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